For every one reality show loaded with hot male messes, there are about 100 filled with bitchy female messes (meaning, Tool Academy vs. the rest of reality television). So WHY oh WHY did VH-1 decide to make season 3 of Tool Academy not only CO-ED, but throw in a big butch lesbian tool at that???
Not that the season will be any less entertaining, but throwing a bull dyke and a skank mess into the arena with all the men absolutely detracts from the testosterone levels (although, I think the lesbian alone might have more testosterone than every guy on the show).
On the bright side, the hetero skank mess tool was enrolled by her REALLY attractive boyfriend, who deserves so much better than her, even if she does end up graduating the academy. This guy, Kyle, is as chiseled as the Dick Tracy comic book character…the stress being on “Dick”. He’s probably my favorite male on the new season (sadly, no picture of him yet), which also includes a couple of other hot mess guy candy.
Long Island boy Jordan is obsessed with being in a boy band. And hey, who knows. Boy bands may be making a comeback as the 90s begin celebrating their 20 year anniversary. Jordan definitely has a fantastic body, carefully grooms himself (to look younger) and is cute in, well, an aging boy band member kind of way, but he’s a self-loathing Jew, which is a real turnoff. This guy changed his name and wears crucifixes as part of his ‘persona’ because he doesn’t’ think it’s cool to be Jewish. Sad.
Tommy is someone I kind of forget until he’s on screen again, but every time he is, I’m like, oh yeah, he’s kinda cute.
Shawn has the same name as my all-time favorite Tool Academy student, messy-Mohawk Shawn, who I can’t BELIEVE hasn’t gotten his own reality show yet. Anyway, this new Shawn is adorable because he pretty much looks exactly like Seann William Scott, minus the goofball edge in the facial features.
And finally, there’s Angelo, the big cry baby of the show. He just has that sexy doofus thing going on. Bald, strong nose, bubbly lips, and a body to die for that more than makes up for his goofy facial expressions, which are actually kind of cute in their own way.
Oh, and here’s another piece of Tool Academy news while I’m at it. If I’m not mistaken, John L., the big steroid head from season 2, is beginning to dabble in porn. GAY porn, as it appears this is him on a NSFW gay website.
And what better way to end this Tool Academy discussion than with a photo of the number one hottest tool ever, Shawn:
